True friendships are built upon showing up when the other person needs you – often without even being asked to do so. However, knowing where to begin can be difficult, especially if you feel as though your friend is keeping a lot hidden from you.
With that in mind, here are some useful tips that you can follow in order to support a loved one going through a tough time.
Listen without judgement. When dealing with complex emotions, many people attempt to mask them. This is an almost unconscious action, which could be triggered by wanting to carry on as normal or by not wanting to worry those around us. However, this behavior only makes it more difficult to open up further down the line and can lead to feelings of shame and embarrassment.
By letting your friends know that you’re there to listen whenever they are ready to open up and that you will not pass any judgement on them, you make it easier for them to talk about how you are feeling. After all, this can directly combat feels of shame.
Signpost them toward the right support services. While showing up to support your friend often makes the world of difference, there are certain scenarios in which they will need help you are unable to provide. For example, if they are dealing with serious mental health struggles, you may want to recommend that they talk to a therapist.
If they are dealing with drug or alcohol dependency, then it’s likely that they will need to attend some kind of rehab facility, such as Gloria Detox and Rehab Center. Here, not only will they participate in a detox, but they will also find healthier coping mechanisms to rely on moving forward. As the thought of going to rehab alone can be daunting, helping your friend find the facility that is right for them and making a few of the initial calls can be a huge help.
Don’t forget you have to take care of yourself too. Have you ever heard of the saying, “you cannot pour from an empty cup?” Well, this applies in this scenario, too. For example, if you are struggling yourself or failing to address your needs, you’ll find it harder and harder to show up for your friend. As such, you should also ensure that you take better care of your own mental health during this time period.
Focus on developing a wellness routine that allows you to process your feelings and emotions as opposed to burying them away. Talk to others about how you are feeling, whether that be family members or therapists, and don’t be afraid to seek out additional help if necessary.
The more you take care of yourself, the easier it will be to take care of those around you—your friends included. It’s also important to note that you are not the sole person in charge of looking out for your friend, and it’s okay to ask others to step in and help, too.
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